Sexuality & Relationship Concerns
“Yesterday I was clever and wanted to change the world, today I am wise and I am changing myself” – Rumi
Congratulations in taking the first step to allow the life that you desire and deserve to emerge. I am honored to join you on this journey. We will talk, think, explore, question, process, and deliberate together until the image of your desired life becomes clear to you and you are equipped with the tools and skills to nurture it for many years to come. Below are some principles that will inform our work together.
“Lovers won’t finally meet somewhere. There are in each other all along” – Rumi
The quality of the relationships in our lives determines the quality of our lives overall. These relationships include those we have with food, money, children, partners, colleagues, and so on. We know that having a secure and fulfilling bond with another human being can lower our cortisol level and blood pressure, and helps with our overall cognitive abilities and concentration. People who are in such relationships are not only healthier but they are more productive at work and treat others more kindly.
Through our work together, you will confidently connect with the immense source of love within you, also known as self-love or self-compassion. This will ultimately empower you to connect with others at a deeper, more real, and enriching level. This way of thinking and being in the world will guide you towards finding a partner with whom you can share your life. Instead of waiting for love to happen to you, you will help it emerge. I call this Emergent Love.
“What you seek is seeking you.” – Rumi
I am deeply influenced by Sufism, especially worldviews of Bastami, Rumi, and Attar. My goal for you, regardless of your religion or spiritual orientation, is to hone your intuition and set the right intentions, allowing you to let go so you can attract the connections you desire and deserve.
“If you are irritated by every rub, how will your mirror be polished?” – Rumi
When someone irritates us, it means that they deregulated our nervous system, commonly known as our gut. Many people assume the brain thinks and the body follows but, from recent studies in the fields of neurobiology and neurophysiology, we now know the opposite is true. The body assesses a situation and then sends signals to the brain, advising us to act in a certain way. When we perceive a threat, it takes about 20 minutes for our body to calm down so it can once again be responsive to a person or situation rather than reactive. In the process of our work, we will focus on strategies and tools with which you can equip yourself so that you present in the world with a polished gut, so you are more in control of the input your nervous system receives, and so you have tools to calm yourself in a triggering situation. I explained the concept of a polished gut in an interview with ignite intimacy- listen here.
I highly recommend that we connect for about 15 minutes to see if our fit could work for us both before committing to the process and even the first scheduled consultation session. Contact me to arrange for this preliminary call.
Initial Consultation
This is the first face-to-face consultation or virtual session that you — individually or together with your partner(s) — will have with me.
I recommend that initially we meet for a longer session (2 hours) as there will be a lot of information we would exchange including the top findings of your RPI test (see below).
You will describe your concern(s) in detail. I will ask you specific questions and, at the end of the session, we will set realistic goals together and decide what path is the best way forward. Sometimes, this means referral to other specialists or getting other colleagues and care providers involved (for example, your primary care physician, a physical therapist, a mental health provider or another specialist).
If you are a couple, it is highly recommended that you take the Relationship Panoramic couples test before your first visit (please keep in mind that the report will take up to 72 hours to be prepared). This will give us a holistic assessment of the areas in your relationship that are strong and the ones that need focused attention.
If there is a need for specific physical accommodation or if you are a public figure needing extra privacy, please let me know beforehand.
Individual and Couples Consultations
Ongoing consultations can be scheduled for up to three months in advance to ensure your preferred times/dates are accommodated. They will be on a weekly basis initially and take 50 minutes each unless we agree otherwise).
You can attend the sessions together as a couple or individually, depending on how it suits your program.
We will review your progress along the way. After you achieve your goals, you will arrange for appointments every other weeks and then once a month or every other month. After that, you can book ad hoc sessions, as you need.
Your commitment to the process and the homework you are assigned to determines your level of success. I will follow your pace to ensure that the program fits your lifestyle and other priorities in your everyday life.
We will meet through a HIPAA compliant and encrypted virtual platform.
The content of our sessions will be kept confidential. There are exceptions to this (such as harming yourself or others), which will be discussed on your first visit. You will be informed before any information is shared with a third party.
I am a social psychologist, Senior accredited member and a registered clinical supervisor by The College of Sex and Relationship Therapists (COSRT) in the United Kingdom and a Certified Sexuality Counselor (CSC) and Approved Training Provider by the American Association for Sexuality Educators Counselors and Therapists (AASECT). I serve on various executive and scientific boards across professional and academic organizations and have published extensively in the areas of sexual function, cultural diversity, couples. love and healthy relationships.
With all these, I have decided not to practice within the licensed profession of a mental health provider in the United States for two main reasons: 1) I don’t necessary like to work with pathology (i.e. giving diagnosis), and 2) I would like to be able to supervise colleagues and help clients from around the country and the world which I could not have done with a State-specific license.
The scope of my work is within two general capacities: 1) a thinking partner and 2) an educational consultant.
What does this mean for you?
- Our consultations are not covered by insurances in the United States.
- If needs be, I will make suggestions for your referral to a licensed mental health professional to get the support you need.
I am based in Beverly Hills, California and see clients virtually within California, across States and the world.